


Old traditions (29 isn't old guys)

by Hopefully_not_a_shitty_ballerina



Series: Bandom Spanking one shots & spin-offs [1]
Category: Don't Threaten Me With a Good Time - Panic! at the Disco (Song), Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Birthday Spanking, Other, Spanking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-18 08:05:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13677651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hopefully_not_a_shitty_ballerina/pseuds/Hopefully_not_a_shitty_ballerina
Summary: So this work wouldn't exist without EdgarAllenPoet, who inspired me to make a continuation of their work. This work takes place during the 2016-2017 tour that Panic! did, I thought it would be interesting to see how it was continued with new people, and a two people who were there for the first session of birthday spankings. We all know that i have trouble writing Brendon, so feel free to yell at me about how unrealistic he is.





	Old traditions (29 isn't old guys)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Twenty-two](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5914657) by [EdgarAllenPoet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdgarAllenPoet/pseuds/EdgarAllenPoet). 



When everyone messed with Jon on his birthday, years earlier, it had been fun. And it had sparked a new tradition between the boys in panic. So when tour hit on someone's birthday, it would be a day of playing grab ass with the birthday boy.

 

However, when Ryan and Jon left the band, Brendon, Zach, and Spencer had barely kept that tradition alive. It wasn't the same, and with how high tensions usually ran, hitting one another usually didn't have the best of results. Soon after Dallon joined, the tradition came back alive- abet briefly- so that they would all smack Spencer as hard as they could in passing on his birthday. but it never got farther than that because of the end of tour, and Spencer leaving the band.

 

So on Brendon's 26th birthday, when Zach smacked him hard and painful, Brendon was sufficiently confused. 

 

"AH FUCK!" Brendon grabbed his ass check in hand and whirled around to face the taller man, only to have a plate of microwave waffles thrust into his hands. 

 

"Happy birthday Brendon." Zack said, he turned and walked into the back of the bunks without a second look. "Try not to get syrup everywhere." Brendon continued to cup his ass, as he gingerly sat down in the booth. Zack had set some things out on the table for him. 

 

A whine escaped Brendon's mouth as he flopped down, his ass tingled slightly were Zack had swatted him. "We are  _ not _ starting that tradition up again." Brendon muttered. Spencer was the next to wake up, coming out of the Bunks, bearly eyed and sleep deprived. but carrying a bag from Barnes and noble.

 

“Happy birthday bitch." He said, and he chucked the bag in Brendon's direction. "Can't say it's life changing, but it's a damn good book."Spencer grabbed a water out of the fridge and walked over to the booth. He leaned down to hug Brendon, who stood on his feet under the table to hug him, lifting his ass off the seat to do so. Spencer pulled him up a little and pulled his hand back before swatting Brendon as hard as he could.

 

SWAT

 

"AH FUCK!" Brendon cursed as Spencer dropped him back on the booth. "that huuuuuuurrrtttt" Brendon whined.  Spencer laughed and sat opposite him in the booth. He grinned at Brendon and ran his thumb over his mouth.

 

"Happy birthday old man." He said, motioning at Brendon's empty plate. "breakfast of champions, eh?"

 

"Fuck off!" Brendon muttered. He got up out of the booth and rubbed his ass, keeping it pointed away from Spencer. Spencer laughed loudly, as Brendon rubbed his ass, masking the sound of Dallon taking a run up the isle of bunks towards Brendon.

 

cRACK! 

 

Spencer’s drum sticks collided with Brendon's ass. Brendon, for his part, took it fairly well. 

 

"goD DAMNIT!" Brendon yelled, his voice an octave higher than usual. "we are  _ not starting this god damned tradition agai-"   _ before he could finish, Zack had Brendon hoisted into the air, and was man handling him into a better position.  "ZACH!" Screeched Brendon, "ZACh STOP WAIT ZACH THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE IT-"

 

"Come get your licks in while he's immobal!" Dallon and Spencer came over to swat Him, as Brendon struggled in Zack's grasp. 

 

"Hurts!" gasped Brendon Brendon gave him a hard swat to his sit spots. Zack set Brendon on his feet and gripped Brendon around the middle. Quickly delivered four stinging swats to Brendon's ass.

 

Brendon grasped onto Zach’s arm and gasped as the pain washed over him. Zach released him, and ruffled Brendon's hair.

 

"How many's that?" Spencer asked. 

 

"You expect me to keep count _?! _ " rasped Brendon. "Fuck all of you." 

 

"Well, we could always look at your ass." Dallon said, leaning against the wall to the bunks. "Bend over and show us your ass Bren, come one now." he said in a sugary tone, like one that would be used with a child.

 

"Fuck," Brendon said, pointing at all of the people in tern, " _ all  _ of you." Zach sighed, and went to grab Brendon again only to have him slump in his arms and land hard on the floor. 

 

"I mean it!" Brendon hissed, trying and failing to scoot away from the ring of men. "This was a dumb tradition when we started it and it's dumb now!" Kenny appeared from the bunks and grasped Brendon from behind, picking him up. 

 

"Give'im a break guys. S'to early for this bull." Kenny lightly smacked Brendon's ass and ruffled his hair. "Let's say that's ten, Eh?" Kenny maneuvered around the guys on the bus, and turned the Xbox on. 

 

"You all just going to stand there?" everyone shuffled around, making a few grabs' for Brendon's ass, but no one really succeeding, aside from Kenny, who got a propper smack in before pulling Brendon in for a hug. 

 

The next two hours passed in relative peace, as everyone had settled down to play on their phone, or play some kind video game. Brendon was alternating between watching Dallon play Fable on the small front TV and reading birthday messages from friends and family on twitter. 

 

Brendon frowned at his phone. Sara hadn’t messaged him at all, and it’s not like he was desperate for her attention, or whatever. It was just that it was his birthday. And They were married. “Dallon if you are married to someone do you have to send them a birthday message?” Brendon asked, fully expecting Dallon to wave him off or ignore him.

 

“Nope, totally a thing.” Dallon said, never taking his eyes off of the screen. “She totally doesn’t love you anymore.” Brendon gasped and chucked his phone at Dallon. It beamed him in the side of the face, and that was all it took for Dallon to jump across the small table and start wrestling with Brendon.

 

“ZAch!” Brendon screeched, he was trying to role Dallon off of him, but Dallon had him pinned at the waist, and was tickling him mercilessly. “ah ! Dallon stop!” Brendon jerked around wildly, trying to get Dallon to stop tickling him.

 

“Just because it’s your birthday doesn’t mean that you can act like a little shit!” Dallon weezed, Brendon had knocked him in the stomach in his attempts to get away. Dallon ticked brendon’s lower side, and Brendon’s hips bucked as he turned at the same time, effectively sending the side of Dallons face into the table. 

 

Zach chose this time to intervene, coming from the back room and pulling Dallon off of Brendon and swatting him hard. Brendon, who realized that he was next, tried to scramble away on the ground. But Zach was to fast, and had pulled him up and hit him so hard tears came into his eyes.

 

“Fucking idiots.” Zach muttered. He was holding Dallon’s face, and looking at the small cut on his temple from hitting the table. “Can’t leave you alone for longer than a few minutes without you trying to kill each other.” 

 

“M’fine Zach.” Dallon said. Zach released him, and stalked back to the back room of the bus. Dallon and Brendon stood looking at each other for a minute. Brendon had slipped his hands into his pants, and was gently cupping his own ass, trying to resolve the sting. Dallon, who wasn’t as fazed by the swatt, picked up his controller before sitting back down. Brendon sighed, and grabbed his phone. 

 

“I’m takin’ a nap!” he yelled, before turning to the bunks. “Twelve down, 18 to go.” muttered Brendon. As he was climbing into his bunk, Kenny stuck his head out of his own and nailed Brendon’s backside, causing him to hiss.

 

“Make that thirteen Bebo!” Kenny said with a smirk. The look that Brendon gave Kenny would have killer a lesser man, unfortunately, that man was not kenny. “Now worries I’ll come and get ya again when the bus stops!” he pulled himself back into his bunk and disappeared from Brendan’s line of sight.

 

The next half hour was a quiet bliss for Brendon, and by the time he was being hauled out of his bunk by Kenny, he was more than ready to face his ‘friends.’ Or at least, as quiet as it could be when your wife wOULDNT FUCKING ANSWER A TEXT MESSAGE. Anyway

, brendon had devised a plan in his time in the bunks.

 

“Fuck  _ off _ ’ Brendon sang, he elbowed Kenny hard in the ribs, and Kenny released him, dropping him on the ground. Brendon took this chance, and made a start for the door of the bus, only to run into dan,who seemed to be ready for him. 

 

Brendon turned and wiggled his ass at Spencer, thinking that inviting him to it him would turn him off it, or at the least, that inviting it would get it over sooner rather than later. For the later, he was correct, and Spencer walloped him good with his hand, before laughing loudly.

 

“FInally deciding to play along?” Spencer laughed, Kenny came from the bunks, a scowl on his face. Brendon turned his slightly stinging ass on Kenny and wiggled.

 

“Want a go?” He challenged. Kenny hit him kindly, softer than he maybe deserved for knocking him in the ribs, but Brendon had decided that Kenny was holding out on him for something, and that was never good.

 

Zack stuck his head in just as Brendon was straightening up, holding a coffee in his hand, and his cell phone in the other.

 

“You all can come off, no wandering around outside the venue, if you need something, tell a tech to do it.” Zack said, not looking up from his phone. He the got off the bus, and walked away. Brendon pushed around the guys to get off the bus, earning himself a smack from someone -probably Spencer- and pushed himself out into the sunlight. Brendon lay on the grass of the shitty little road island and smiled up and the clouds. 

 

“THE GRASS SMELLS REALLY NICE!” Brendon announced, Dallon, the last person off the bus, shook his head and sat down on the grass next to Brendon. “Are you mad at me for smashing your head?” Brendon asked, Dallon sighed as he picked at the grass.

 

“No, I’m not mad.” Brendon watched as he rubbed the bruise forming on his temple.

 

“It looks like it hurts.” He commented, quickly looking away from the glare that Dallon cast his way.

 

“Gee, I wonder why that is,” Dallon said dryly. They sat in silence for a moment before Brendon spoke again.

 

“Are you going to smack me when I get up?”

 

“Most definitely.” Dallon said, he a book he had brought with him from the bus  and was immediately enthralled. Brendon decided that he was content to sit there for a while cloud gazing. Who says birthdays have to be exciting and crazy?

 

Oh, right. He did. Brendon lay on the shitty island grass and watched as the other two tour buses rolled up, noting how long it to the other boys to get off of their busses, and come over and talk to their little group. 

 

“HEY BRENDON!” Pete yelled, Brendon cracked open an eye at the short man frantically waving in his direction. He sighed, and sat up. As soon as Brendon’s ass was high enough, Dallon swung his book. It connected painfully with Brendon’s ass. Brendon let out a low moan, that surprised not only him, but dallon and pete, the only two people around them. 

 

“Like that one a little too much?” Dallon muttered, he stuck his nose back in his book, and ignored the embarrassed look that crossed Brendon’s face. 

 

“Happy birthday man!” Pete opened his arms up for a hug, and though Brendon was expecting the smack from him, that didn’t make it hurt any less. “My little bebo is all grown up!” he whipped a fake tear from his face and laughed. “I still remember when we first met! You were so excited to be allowed to stay up late!”

 

Brendon rolled his eyes and smiled. “Yeah I remember.” Pete’s eyes glazed over a bit, and he sighed.

 

“Anyway,” sMACK Pete smacked Brendon again, “I was so happy when I was told you all started this tradition up again.” He grinned at Brendon’s quickly reddening face, and walked away, with a wave in Dallon’s direction.  Brendon turned on Dallon and scowled.

 

“So who told Pete that we were starting this tradition up again?” Dallon said nothing, just continued to smirk into his book, “Because we are  _ not starting this damn tradition up again _ !”

 

“It’s just a game!” Pete called from over by his bus, Brendon didn’t turn to face him, but flipped him off and pulled out his phone. There was a crash behind him, and Brendon turned around to see the Josh, from twenty one pilots holding two pans, next to Tyler, who looked incredibly annoyed. 

 

“Just, josh-”

 

CRASH! Josh crashed the two pans together, making Tyler flinch, there was a smile creeping onto the sides of his face.

 

“I think we could use in the show!” Josh was grinning enthusiastically, so much so that Brendon wasn’t sure if he was joking or not.

 

“Hey Josh!” Pete yeled, a grin was spreading across his face, and Brendon definitely didn’t trust it. “Com’ere a second!”  He frowned, as Josh jogged over to Pete. Tyler looked around, before turning to go back onto his bus, only to be stopped by someone getting off of that same bus. Brendon was lost in thought, when he noticed Josh walking over, a confused look on his face.

 

“Pete says I need to hit you?” Josh said, he scratched the back of his head, confused. Brendon laughed and flipped Pete the bird, before shaking his head.

 

“Not everyone wants to be a part of this!” Brendon yelled, Pete laughed, and shook his head at Brendon. He was rummaging through a bag for something, and didn’t look up. 

 

“You never know!” He called back

 

“It’s my birthday.” Brendon explained. “My ‘friends” He used air quotes around the world, and Dallon snorted behind him, “Think it’s funny to try and give me birthday spankings. Pete’s just trying to include you.”

 

“Ah,” Josh said, he nodded awkwardly, before breaking into a smile. “Boy do we have weird friends!” Brendon smiled at his use of ‘we’ they had all been having trouble making the two band member feel included in their weird little circle. “So do you mind if I?”

 

Brendon laughed before turning around and bending over, wiggling his ass for Josh. “Give me your best shot!” Josh drew his arm back and swung. It was around this time that Brendon regretted his choice of words. 

 

Brendon shot up and grasped his ass rubbing franticly. Pete cackled from his spot a few feet away, and Tyler and the guy he was talking to (mark?) looked over. 

 

“Too much?” Josh said sheepishly, Dallon took this time to stand up and clap Him on the shoulder. 

 

“Nope! That was perfect!” Brendon shot Dallon a look, that said he thought otherwise.

 

“Maybe just a bit to much.” Muttered Brendon, he clapped Josh on the back,  and continued to cup his ass with his left hand. “No hard feelings,” Brendon said, flashing a smile at Josh.

 

“Hey Josh!” Tyler yelled, Josh turned to him and smiled, “You’re out of the band!” 

“No way!” josh yelled, he began to run in the direction of Tyler, who had made a mad dash for the bus. Brendon turned around, and looked at the venue that they were parked behind. Wary of footsteps, and the people around him, Brendon went back to the bus, in search of his wallet. 

 

“Wait a minute!” Pete yelled, he was holding a box wrapped up in comics, and had an eat-shit-grin on his face. “I got you something!” Brendon smiled, and took the box, allowing himself to be pulled into another hug, no smack included. 

 

“What is it?” Brendon asked, he held the box up to his head and shook lightly, only to be met with heavy rustling.

 

Pete grin harder, “Just open it!” So Brendon did, he tore off the comics and saw the packaging, nearly dropping his present when he did.

 

“Really?” He laughed, “ fo fucks sa- I can’t believe you.” He laughed again and tore the comics off of the box of capri suns. “Are these wild berry?” He paused, and looked at the box, “They are! Oh man- Pete, Just!” he sighed, and pulled Pete into a one armed hug. “tHis is- this is the best and yet” he laughed, “ the best and the worst present you have ever given me.” Pete smacked him lightly before letting go of him.

 

“COurse man, only the best for my Bebo, “ He sniffled, and wiped away a non-existent tear, “All grown up! Doesn't even need me anymore!” 

 

“No nO pete,” Brendon’s face contorted into mock seriousness, “ I will always, need you.” 

 

Pete grinned, and shook his head, “nah man, you never needed me,” He turned, and began to jog back to his bus, “see you in the green room!”

 

The hours pre-show were a mix of running around, and avoiding smacks from his friends, and by the time that Brendon got his five minute call, he was up to twenty five, so while he was happy that he had one to go, he was fairly positive that he had Spencer’s hand etched into his ass. 

 

“What’s your number?” Zach asked, he spoke to everyone through the headset, so Brendon’s begrudged, ‘twenty five’ was heard by all the members of the band. “Alright, “ ZAch said, “one left, hands off guys!” Brendon’s face screwed up in confusion, but before he could respond, he was given the go ahead to go onstage. 

 

Brendon was weary throughout the entire performance, keeping clear of the guys, and all of the stage hands, but it seemed like no one was making a grab for him. When they finished the last song, and Brendon was about to say his goodbyes, Dallon took to his mic and began to speak to the crowd.

 

“So who here knows what today is?” He asked, the crowd screamed in response, and Dallon smiled, bobbing his head, “Okay good! Who wants to sing Happy birthday?” there was another roar of approval, and brendon laughed, and shook his head, sending sweat droplets everywhere.

 

“We have a surprise for Brendon,” Dallon said, “So when you start singing, his surprise is going to come from over there!” he pointed to the left side of the stage, were Brendon could see nobody but stage hands and Zach. “Ready everyone?” the crowd roared as dallon began to sing, and soon everyone was singing along with him.

 

_ Happy birthday to you,  _

 

_ Happy birthday to you, _

 

Brendon watched as Sara walked out carrying a cake, and the biggest smile he’d ever seen. Suddenly the radio silence from her all day made sense. 

 

_ Happy birthday dear Brendon, _

 

_ Happy birthday to you!  _

 

Sara stood in front of Brendon, holding the cake “Make a wish Brendon,” She said, Brendon smiled and blew out the candles. Dallon took the cake from Sara, who Promptly wrapped her arms around Brendon, and hugged him. The turned in a circle slowly as they hugged, and when Brendon’s ass was facing away from the crowd, Sara smacked him, as hard as she could from her weird angle. 

 

Brendon gasped and looked down at her, she grinned and pressed up on her tiptoes to kiss him.

 

“Twenty six Brendon, Happy birthday.”

 

fin

 

**Author's Note:**

> This took so fucking long, no joke, I think this is the longest amount of time it has taken me to actively write a fic. well, I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
